My Spiritual Life Ramblings

Wednesday, May 10, 2006


"Why are there so many songs about rainbows, and what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but illusions and rainbows have nothing to hide."
so sings Kermit the Frog on my CD player.

Yes indeed I remember so vividly of every lovely vision of a rainbow I have ever seen in my life.
They are so... transparent, hiding nothing, yet you see the splendour, of a myraid of colours so closely knitted, so prettily lined up in a perfect arc.
Another majestic display of God's creativity, as are the stars and the mountains and seas.

Yet it is a reminder of God's promise to us.
That He will never hurt us, or cause us to perish in a big scale disaster again after The Flood in Genesis.
To me, it speaks so dearly and so clearly of His compassion and His Love.
Something so personal, yet so public.

"Someday We'll find it, the Rainbow Connection, the Lovers, the Dreamers, and Me."

Monday, March 06, 2006


Am grieved after BS yesterday.

Why? Coz it's been a long time since I got personal with the Holy Spirit, long time since I heard so personally from Him on every minute aspect of my life.

I'm reduced now to just hearing the big picture. And there's all.

I feel so far and distant. Although I know He's there, I can't feel Him like I used to anymore.
On the little nitty gritties of life. On the little conversations we have. On the sudden revelation of a side of God I've never seen before and suddenly discovering. On the exciting what's-going-to-happen-next moments. On the secrets He whispered to me.

I don't know what had happened, or what did I do wrong.
But I think it's the compacting lifestyle I led, that moved me further and further into the cold hard desert.

I want my old lifestyle back.
I want to know the secrets.
I want to have pleasant new revelations.
Most of all, I want to get personal again.

Sunday, January 22, 2006


I recall this short story, about footprints that I had read and received bookmarks and cards when I was still schooling. Back then, life was carefree and easy when one is in school. the only thing that probably bothers or pain/ hurt me were minute mundane issues like when my parents caned me/ scold me for things I felt unjustified/ wrongfully accused of, or when the cute guy in school whom I had a secret crush on started going out with another girl (who most of the time is the bitchy, vain sort).
And now grown up, life's problems get more real.
Somehow this afternoon, standing in the midst of the congrgation during church service, God brought me to remembrance about this stort story again. I'd been thru a rough and difficult patch in 2005 when Daddy died, and a job (which I've quit my previous job for) didn't work out as planned, resulting me in getting another job which I totally hate ( but didn't felt right about quitting when I prayed about it). Coupled with other nonessential but taxing issues, I feel really sorry for myself.

I don't want to feel pain like that again, I told God.
Why disappoint me time and again? And suddenly the story came to mind.
I guess there's more I have to go through in life.
Like the cliche saying Life's not a bed of roses.
He's just reminding me that He'll see me through. And when I falter from the lacking in strength from the toils and burdens, He'll make good His promise to see me through.

Footprints

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed
he was walking along the beach with the LORD.

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets of
footprints in the sand: one belonging
to him, and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.

He noticed that many times along the path of
his life there was only one set of footprints.

He also noticed that it happened at the very
lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he
questioned the LORD about it:

"LORD, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me."

The LORD replied:

"My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

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